The TMZ Attitude of the Church

You’re a Chris­t­ian. You just got caught embez­zling money. You got caught cheat­ing on your spouse. You got caught lying to a large group of peo­ple about your true nature. Every­one just found out that you’re an alcoholic.

Worst part? You’re a mem­ber of a large church. Every­one knows you and respects you. Past tense: Respected you.

Now, your sin is out there for every­one to see.

Your sin gets exposed in sev­eral dif­fer­ent ways. You may come for­ward with it on your own. You con­fess to your spouse, your church and to your friends, hop­ing for a restora­tion to a Chris­t­ian walk. That doesn’t hap­pen very often. When it does, some­times it turns out well.

Maybe you get caught. When you get caught, it might make front page news. Maybe you get arrested. Maybe the phone lines burn up with words like, “Can you believe _​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​did _​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​_​? Unbelievable!”

What you will learn quickly is who your friends are.

The Chris­t­ian com­mu­nity is called to restore those who fall. Gala­tians 6:1 can­not be any clearer: Broth­ers, if any­one is caught in any trans­gres­sion, you who are spir­i­tual should restore him in a spirit of gen­tle­ness. Keep watch on your­self, lest you too be tempted.

Unfor­tu­nately, in many churches in our world, the idea of restora­tion has been mixed with a TMZ idea of scan­dal and soap opera drama. Instead of rush­ing to the sinner’s side, many paris­hon­ers sit on their hands and wait to see what will hap­pen next. When the faintest waft­ing of gos­sip comes their way, the prayer chain is jammed with misinformation.

Mem­bers don’t bring cov­ered dishes, they stand back with dis­dain and judgment.

Why does this type of atti­tude remain in our churches? I’ve writ­ten about it in my book, but it has to be said over and over again if we are to attempt to restore the sin­ners in our midst. If they aren’t worth sav­ing, who is?

Many peo­ple look down on a sin­ner because it gives them a chance to say, “I’m bet­ter than they are.” It’s like we can all line our­selves up from most devi­ous to most right­eous. But that doesn’t work in God’s econ­omy. The jus­ti­fi­ca­tion of Christ means that all Chris­tians stand holy before God. When any of us com­mit a sin, we are for­given. He still holds us fast in His hand and for­gives us when we ask.

Many look down on us because they see how close they are to the same sin. Our own sin exposes their sin­ful hearts. We are each capa­ble of the most heinous sins if we do not stand guard and give our­selves to the Spirit.

When a mem­ber falls, when a mem­ber sins, make haste to their side. Even if they don’t answer right away. Even if they dis­tance them­selves from you. Even if they don’t return your calls or texts. Approach them in love, not judg­ment. Let them know you love them. Treat them like the per­son they were before. They need to know they are loved. God is the one who will work on their hearts. Trust God to do His work and you stand by and walk with them.

And as my mother used to say, “If you can’t say any­thing nice, don’t say any­thing at all.”