Category Archives: bitterness

Why Churches Aren’t Growing: Transparency & The Fallen Church

So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. (Matthew 5:23-24 ESV) I write a lot about reconciliation and forgiveness. There are several reasons for this. First,… Read more »

Your Church Already Has A Plan To Deal With Adultery

You may not be aware of this, but your church already has a plan to deal with adultery or any other major crisis. It does. On this site, I primarily deal with the crisis of a pastor leaving when he’s caught in adultery, so I’m going to deal with that. Churches today are finding themselves in this situation more and… Read more »

When The Pastor Gets Caught

The day comes out of nowhere and the news hits everyone hard. Everyone learns that the pastor has committed adultery. Or, for that matter, they’ve discovered he’s embezzled or been lying about something horrible. Everyone has a different reaction. I was a pastor and I fell when I committed adultery. I had kept it secret for a few months, but… Read more »

Lashing Out After A Pastor Falls: How Bad It Can Get

Lately, both Allison and I have been ministering to fallen ministers and their significant others. A recurring theme has arisen in many of these conversations: “How angry is the ex-wife/husband in the relationship allowed to get?” Obviously, I have experience in this arena. I hurt my ex horribly with my actions. Hurt is the emotion that arises first, then anger…. Read more »

The Joel Osteen Hoax: How Much Do We Hate This Guy?

You’ve probably heard it by now. But you may be wrong in what you heard. Joel Osteen, the pastor of Lakewood Church in Houston, Texas, the man with the smile that never seems to stop, doesn’t believe in God anymore. At least that was the “headline” running across the Internet days ago. There was an accompanying video, screenshots of stories… Read more »

Gay Marriage, the Church, and the Jesus Response

I was so thankful yesterday to get a Facebook inbox message from a friend who was concerned about the current argument in America over gay marriage. Like many Christians, she was concerned about the moral failure of the country. She had been watching Facebook and so have I. I too, have seen many comments like, “Why don’t people see what… Read more »

When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Enough, Part 1

Have you ever been in a situation where you’ve either directly or indirectly wronged someone and come to the point where you knew it was time to say, “I’m sorry“? It’s not easy to ask for forgiveness. It is the right thing to do and it takes humility and the right heart. I deal with fallen pastors a lot. I’m… Read more »

The Confused Community: The Wounded Church, Part 3

(This is part three of a series of who is effected by the fall of a pastor. It’s been three years since my own fall from ministry and hopefully since writing Fallen Pastor: Finding Restoration in a Broken World, talking to people who have hurt and been hurt, I have some hopeful advice.) When a pastor falls, a sort of… Read more »

Taking A Pastor’s Fall Personally

I’m the kind of guy who takes things very personally. Some people are just wired that way. I like to act like things just roll off my back and I really don’t care but I’m pretty sensitive. I’ve gotten better since I started blogging about not taking things personally, which is a good thing for all of us to learn…. Read more »

Another Fallen Pastor, More Judging.

I just read a story about Zachery Tims, pastor of a megachurch in Orlando, Florida. Never heard of him before tonight. Apparently, he was found dead in New York from a drug overdose. The article I link tells of his roller coaster past. He had one of the largest churches in central Florida – over 7,000 members. As a young… Read more »